“Polyps”, he said immediately after I took off my pants.
In another context, I might think he was suggesting some lewd act, and somehow I was some poor Vietnamese boy involved in some socially-evil act.
(Hey, I saw it on Boomtown)
That day, however, I was at Bach Mai hospital in Hanoi undergoing a physical.
After pulling my pants back up, I asked him more about Polyps. Defined on me as a tumor on my ass, could be cancerous but likely not. Definitely should have surgery to remove it and prevent further growth.
Tumor? Uh oh!
To change the subject for a little bit, Vietnamese health care….is scary.
US Hospital:
- get appointments for non-critical issues
- abhor dirtiness, any potential feelings for disease. sterilize everything from the hospital itself to all the little items
- doctors tend to be knowledgeable in general medicine, though may specialize in a specific area, like pediatrics or gynecology
- expensive as hell, if you don’t have health care, just die
Vietnamese Hospital:
- No Appointments (even if you want them): Instead, get there early in the morning and hope you can get seen within a couple of hours (a coworker told me that oftentimes, a person is coming from far away and they need the results that day so they don’t have to spend an extra day in the city). My physical ended up taking nearly an entire workday.
- Super Crowded: imagine sitting around a ton of other people (no spacing), at least some of them very sick. There may be air conditioning, but that doesn’t mean it’s cool in the room.
- Filthy: see super crowded and no appointments, also see anecdote below. Instruments are sterilized, (they better be), but other than that……ewww.
- Doctors Specialize in a Specific Area: (like ear or mouth, but) do not have general understanding of medicine. A doctor here is not like a doctor in the US. In the US, I expect Emil to know at least a little bit about everything and he should be able to save my ass (hmm, bad joke in the context of this post) down the road once he graduates from med school. For my physical, I went to 8 different people around to hospital to check out my different body parts, one guy for mouth, one guy for ear, one guy for eye, one guy for blood, etc.
- Costs: Vietnamese do pay for health care coverage, not from their companies, but from the government. As far as I know, it is reasonably affordable for an average person here.
Regarding the Vietnamese hospital, it may sound like I’m judging with the arrogant demeanor of an American and his culture shock. Perhaps so, but I bet that even Vietnamese people would agree with me- a hospital/medical visit here is not for preventive medicine, but for when there’s no other choice.
Don’t mistake it- this difference surely isn’t from a lack of seriousness about health care. My assumption is that it’s simply about money. Vietnam doesn’t have it.
Welcome to Street Food Health Care:
I was asked to give a urine sample, so I rounded the corner to the near men’s bathroom. You know how bathrooms at the beach look, all sandy, all dirty with water around. It looks terrible but you know it’s just sand rather than truly dirty?
That’s what the hospital bathroom looked like. But that wasn’t sand on the ground.
If you’ve ever been to Vietnam, you probably freaked out a little the first time you had street food. Kind of dirty, would never be able to sell food in the US in that environment. Occasional rats, dirty ground, chicken bones all over. That impression is what you’ll find at the hospitals.
Anyway, I tried to find a clean stall to do my thing, but nothing was quite available. I also saw there was no sink to wash my hands. I don’t know about you, but peeing in a test tube perfectly (nurse wanted half-way only) is not that easy, and to get the measurement right, I ended up peeing on my hands (I admit it!).
Problem is remember, no sink. I could probably live with pee on my hands but there was pee on the test tube and I didn’t want to hand it back like that. I tried looking for a water spout, there was one, but another guy was doing something that was a little disturbing next to it, so I couldn’t do that. No water fountains. After a few minutes I wiped the tube with my pants and gave the tube back to the nurse.
Probably knowing I was a disgusting bastard, she had me put the tube on the tray itself rather than deal with it. Lucky her.
I forgot to mention. As I left the bathroom, a patient coming in threw up on the floor, almost hitting me.
The typical sterile hospital environment? Not quite.
When a tumor isn’t a tumor:
I was worried about the tumor for a bit, I doubted I had cancer, but the idea of surgery is no fun. I have AIG Global Health care (global except for the US and Canada), and was advised to check out the Viet Phap (French) hospital in Hanoi, the best hospital here. Had it checked out, and after some finger prodding, good news!
No surgery! No tumor! Just hemorrhoids. The three major things for them are drinking alcohol, not enough water, and not enough vegetables. I don’t drink alcohol, and I drink a TON of water, so I will concede the third option.
$60 USD for 10 minutes. That claim better come through, but good news nonetheless. Now, if my eyes would stop itching so much….my health might be ok.
